Parents make me angry reddit.
As a 22-year-old, I'm right there with you.
Parents make me angry reddit Yesterday my mom and I went to the mall bc I wanted to distract her from the situation, but instead she decided to pick up the phone and stayed in the car talking for majority of the time we were there. I never know what will make them angry. But, whenever I'm around she is constantly insulting me, no matter who's around to hear it. I’m getting more and more depressed every day. The issue is, my parents dont even talk to me anymore. Kicked me when I was so down. I think it’s important to start by saying that something can trigger even the most placid person at some point in his or her life. I remember telling to a therapist about my anger at the enabling parent, but the therapist kept trying to remind me that the enabler parent was not the narcissistic one. Probaply because they still treat me like a child and I see/remember how At first I wrote the title “ when people give me advice “ then I realised it’s not people, it’s my mom. Now, the following is a onetime example but similar things keep Read about the psychological effects of narcissistic parenting, how narcissistic parents hurt their children, and the source of narcissistic mothers and fathers. Strained relationships with parents, neglect or abuse, unresolved childhood conflicts, I am very angry with my parents how will I overcome this? 8-9 months ago i started having therapy, and we have started with focusing my family and i have started to see my parents Why parents get angry. Everything always centered around food so naturally I gravitated to that too. Probaply because they still treat me like a child and I see/remember how Some of this has stemmed from my growing resentment towards my parents, and I feel horrible for feeling that way. If you make me feel sorrow, you get anger. My parents were My dad has always been a "mad person". I blocked YouTube on the Ipad. This kind of hits home with me too. They made me cry almost every week. REMINDER: Rules regarding civility and respect are enforced on this subreddit. When my parents tried to hug me after not acknowledging anything they've done; I immediately felt disgusted, frozen, and dissociated because I felt Being angry is understandable, and I think the Lord understands it too because He knows perfectly what your struggles are like and how your parents make you feel. He was awesome and treated me really well but I had to follow my heart. The irony of parents saying this and kids being fully on board every word and correcting themselves, yet the way parents goes about it hinders kids from bettering themselves, always angry beyond what's necessary and there's something more beneath but you can never pinpoint what it is or they deny it, and when a small fraction of it is returned they respond like the world Posted for a similar reason a good few months ago now. kinda a rant: long story short, on my last post i got slapped and yelled at for being angry over something. Rn my mom just packed a luggage carrier with clothes and has been arguing loudly in front of our house and inside for over an hour about respect or a bunch of stuff, I haven’t even left my room so that I don’t have to see them, and I need to do paperwork for my job in a bit! I've made the best friends I've ever had and people I can count on. I love my parents and they were never as hardcore as the church we attended was. The entire fucking movie would get jammed up in the first ten minutes at a Starbucks as Old Mom Becky accuses the young barista girl of stealing her sun glasses or something equally as fucking stupid, causes a huge fucking scene, and then finds them in her purse twenty minutes into her frothy fucking bitch rant. At first I was willing to do it for her, but it is getting out of hand. My parents are mad that I moved out (after they made me leave) encouraged my siblings to make fun of me as a child which resulted in severe anxiety and insecurities that caused an eating disorder which they blamed on me being lazy at 12-13. If your parents ask you why, simply respond with "I didn't get enough questions right". Read on for a complete guide to why you may feel irritable around your family, with tips on how to cope with your feelings and improve your familial relationships. Or check it out in the app stores My parents get mad at me (19 M) for staying up late to do school work when its the only quiet time I get. There is also support here on reddit, “My parents love me with all their hearts and they’re doing the very best they can with the resources they have. I do get that they want the best for me in their own way, but the way they talk about me breaks my heart. They then take these clothes and put them somewhere in my room but then I get all confused because I can't find them anymore since they're not where I left them. He was never there for me, but now talks about how hard his life is, and how noones there for him. it really pisses me off when they shout all the time like seriously????i was literally sleeping and i was woken up by my mom’s shouting and nagging at my bros like you don’t have to do that . And normally I can deal with the crazy parents and it just rolls off my back. The problem is neither one of my parents would say they are angry people or have anger issues. But how come when I visit home not even a week passes and my parents my mom especially trigger me like she can just flip a switch, it doesn't matter how much inner work I might have done, once she starts talking she pushes all the wrong buttons and I end up shouting at her, the last two arguments I didn't even feel guilty for being angry now granted, i am more on the sensitive side, and i have been a little weird since i was a child, my ambitions weren't conventional and i didn't make friends with kids that my parents liked, as in, kids that my parents liked and compared me to and wanted me to be friends with them to learn from them, but me and them didn't get along, but my I also get mad when I realize that my "tantrums" were actually just me being overstimulated and that my parents could have helped me manage my emotions. You make your dad come to your house often and mow the lawn for This was me and my mum, but we weren't allowed to show any kind of negative emotion at all. The teammates weren't much better either. The (independent) kids need to establish boundaries with the parents, even if it upsets momma. And our reactions scare them, and its human nature to get mad at something you cannot, for the life of you, understand. All the pain my parents have put me through makes me confident that i will be a much kinder, more understanding parent, and my It is strange that I go almost mad when I am visiting my parents. My house is almost always a mess and I'm horrible at putting things away Here's a few examples of things lately that have made me angry Yep, it's part of complex-ptsd. 194 votes, 48 comments. I'm pretty much immune to being chewed out and yelled at by anyone, may it be bosses or customers or random assholes in the street. My Mom met him one time. My siblings would criticize me and make fun of me for being lazy and not getting a job, and they kept telling me to apply at the nearest supermarket and sending me links and emails about vacancies for jobs that did not suit me at all. I am trying to relive those moments and that helps. I do weightlifting with headphones on with angry or empowering It hurts me that my dad treats my sister and me unequally (my dad never gets mad at my sister). I would find myself lashing out constantly (and it didn’t help that i had no one who could listen to me) They would always gang up on me, calling me the “problem child” and called me crazy or “abnormal”, threatening to send me to a psych ward. For example, I hate the sound of people drinking anything, when someone has too much spit in their mouth while their talking, or when people chew gum. It’s hard because it’s your parents, but it’s worth it to find other people in your life that don’t do the same. I am 38 years old, but they still talk to me and treat me For example, I like stargazing with my binoculars, it makes my problems feel small and make my "soul feel clean" (sorry for the cringy expression). I guess I should just hold my ground no natter what :) My parents got mad at me and are disappointment. Please. We’d be in more contact if she would actually call me, but honestly I lol, I’m Reddit on 2 hours of sleep because both my son and I have COVID now. He is now 18 and I am 24 (F) When I wanted to move in to a flat with my friends when I was in college. They seem absolutely disgusted by the People who are unhappy with their lives want the whole world to be as miserable as they are. i’m actually a very loved(i’d say) child and im super happy. All she knows about him is what I’ve told her, yet she is mad at me for breaking up with him even though I had shared my internal struggle about this decision with her. Mine wasn’t my physical but emotional abuse. But my parents didn't believe me about my health. They would make sure that the reason I was crying was because I was a weakling, and that I obviously had flawed logic, I was irrational and incompetent. Because I find that being able to sing the lyrics of violent songs out loud helps me get the anger out, or just having the space to cover my face with a pillow and scream. This sub is a If interactions with your parents continually leave you feeling drained or overwhelmed, you may be dealing with toxic parents. My parents argued with me entire summer. Right away, I want to make something clear: I’m not a homophobe. They bring up the most random topics to start lecturing/yelling at me about even when I say nothing to them. When he was scolding her in the car for "probably faking it to get out of school" she vomited all over the back seat. 2M subscribers in the OUTFITS community. My dad felt his old TV wasn't good enough, and got a 60''. But having my own kids really showed me how bad of a job my parents did with me. In a mad tone she told me to stop playing a game on my phone. My sister is gay, many of my friends are gay. this happens on a daily basis lmao . Sometimes I'll make the effort and do what my mother wants me to do, which is spend some time with her and talk. I was a little worried my kid might see some stuff on YouTube not intended for a 5 year old. This minimization of the damage and my feelings makes me so angry i wanna smash everything. Um, he caused my medical crisis. This is a recovery community. OH MY GOD THE "did someone else influence you" I literally had to deal with this my whole life because I'm such a perceptive person that I made a lot of my own opinions (and in general logical facts) and expressed complex emotions as a child, more than the average kids around me (like accepting your parents words as truth without giving it a Yeah, I dont make a lot of money. and it frustrates me that my parents aren't open-minded enough to respect Quality time. She was relentless and demanding (typically, I would receive up to 30 phone calls from the time I got home from school at 3:30 until she left work at 5 pm, demanding that I do my homework - even when it was actually done), and I became more and more (If I make a mistake I calmly make a detour without making a fuss) When I do tell them to be quiet and let me drive, they retaliate and try to make themselves the victim and start turning it on me. We know so much more now and have instant access to answers, Everything you're saying makes so much sense and makes me think instantly about my father and how I don't think it would even be an issue for me to just cut him off completely (especially since I basically grew up without This sub is a Support Group for those struggling with toxic parents (or just toxic family in general). I used to feel guilt because To make matters worse, I have found that I am much more likely to forget the mistake I made and how to not make it again when she yells at me about it (I think this is due to my brain blocking out the lessons learned due to their association with bad experiences), which only results in her getting more upset when it comes up again due to her So right my mum is the same she always has the excuse that I live far from her it's only 30 minutes and she always complain about me not coming ,I do come most of the times but I would like her to come at least once a week . But now as the year is over, the guilt from this year and my past has accumulated and I feel suffocated and helpless. It's not an indicator of the person you are. Walk away. Should I do this or that? Should I eat this? Can I go out or should I go out?" Etc etc. So, here is my story: I had lost my coat at school, and I was scared about getting it, as I thought it would get me into trouble. I cannot exactly say what it is that makes me so angry. Argh! Parents make me so angry . My mother used to punish me with a belt if my grades weren't passing. Many emotionally neglectful parents are good people trying their best. i think it’s just because he was super neglected as a child, and by his wife that he It’s crazy because growing up I thought I would be an amazing perfect mom. Go to rant r/rant • by adoptdontshop1. Same as you, we have different personalities. I was huge into music in high school. im not even angry or sad abt the grade n i dont rlly care abt it If it works for something, I am 17 and both of my parents have messed up really bad I would take hours to write everything, and for years I had so much repressed anger with them and tried to keep it to keep things in good terms with them but I guess it is not possible, started doing drugs and got caught, and my parents where really supporting As a 22-year-old, I'm right there with you. This made me have good grades and graduate with a 3. Parents may feel angry for a range of reasons. If your anger or feelings of pride are troubling you, well, He can give you a hand there too, my friend. Moving on, it’s 10 at night and he’s mad at me once again for again a tiny reason, and this time I’m fed up of this, i can’t handle this anymore, i When we get together all they want to do is talk about one of the following: A) dredging up some horrible family memory that I don't want to talk about, B) politics or getting really angry about some fox news talking point, C) making a racist or sexist joke (that they probably saw on youtube) or D) asking me repeatedly what is wrong with me No matter how much I try to be strong it never works. i barely can do anything by myself because i am always afraid of what i could do wrong. He also lies a lot. The parents would either nitpick everything the kids did or they would mooch off the kids. For example, he would make my mom call us 5 mins before they arrive so that we can open the garage door and wait for them to unpack their stuff. This article is based on an interview with our clinical Growing up with a toxic parent isn't always obvious. Hurtful, cruel, rude, disrespectful, or "trolling" comments will be removed (along with any replies to these comments) and the offending party may be banned, at the mods' discretion, without warning. Anyway, naturally, all this shit made me develop really bad anger issues. My mother just recently came to the US, but even before she makes me do every single paperwork for her. it’s awful really. It's not you. There is no way to talk to them because they will just start screaming and call disrespectful for “talking back”. It felt like any mistake could end up with her yelling at us. And then my dad tells me I should live near them in case of any medical crisis. It was me making them feel at ease and making sure they had a good time. When I tell my mom she just sides with him and tells me "Everyone's entitled to react how they want and I'm responsible for whether or not I My mom has bpd and reading books about dealing with a parent that has it helped me to gain perspective on her and heal. He is 6 years younger than me. All commenters should be trying to help and any help should be A place on reddit to discuss mental illness Members Online • Anxious-Degree-9463 more rooted in how poor me & my parents relationship is. Your parents have given you more than they ever needed to, and eventually you will be beyond grateful for that. I hope you prosper and achieve all you aim for in your life. Don't waste that opportunity. As someone currently in therapy for intellectualization (analyzing feelings until they go away, not related to being intelligent) causing a stunted range of expressible feelings, this My parents are making me pay for it too. Plus she yells on the phone (happy or mad) so I get to experience all her phone calls with her. I’m thankful for my years unmedicated, as I feel like I’ve undergone 30 years of creative imagination, meditative thought, deep pondering in a 15 year timespan, simply because of how rapidly my brain has always been cycling. She berated me and made me feel bad for not consuming every last crumb. Including emotions expressed by other people. Deal with it!". I, of course, can't tell them that the reason I'm not looking for a job is because I plan on being dead soon. They get mad and irritated at me when I get sick. She has this kind of duality, like she can be really supportive of my feelings, as long as it’s something she understands. Here’s how to cope. I’m 16 right now and I’m gonna stop once I Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. anger at them. my mom often called me an idiot and criticized what i did. I hardly ever get angry, but when I'm around her every comment and action she does makes me feel so much overwhelming anger that I feel unable to hold my tongue. Most adults hate their jobs and are miserable, you find ways to make it better. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. He also got a TV for his room. Even the ones where she shit talks me which I know people who do not have reasonable parents for whom this what not enough. Or some soft items she could throw or something. It hurts to hear your own parents say awful nasty things to you. Downside is, I just can't make myself enter a relationship. I have no excuses for that behaviour. So he stopped talking to me for like a month. Then all of a sudden, my mom started having me make my own decisions on things . My head started Having lived with my mother for 20 years has its advantages. He's quite introverted so it might also be a lack of social skills. My (20M) parents are mad at me for breaking up with my girlfriend (20F) - I don’t know how to tell them to back off . Reddit's Place for Outfits, Welcome! Make sure to read the rules posting or The next thing is that they have no interest at all in me driving, and I've been telling them since I was 15. It never really hit me that my family was different from most others until the third grade, when the bullying started. after a while an ugly dorsal hump grew that looked hidieous and people made fun of me. Made me so much worse off. My mother would literally stand over me with a belt and I still could not make myself concentrate and finish the stupid problems. 196 votes, 305 comments. Too horrible to tell deets. The problem is at the moment I have HUGE amounts of anger against my parents, my psychologist could clearly see it the first time we talked Apparently he was really mad about having to leave work. I can't even be in the same room as them without tensing up. I never told my parents or sister about this but every now and then I feel guilty about what I did to them even If it was a one time thing. For example, I was visiting my mom. But my parents don't treat me like before. They did a whole lot to make fun of me for things I didn't know. "I spent all day trying to be a good mom and now you're just laughing at me like this is some game and not 10pm when all I want is to rest for once and you're doing your In fact, any sound people make with their mouth makes me angry (except talking). I want to be able to love her and care about her again or talk to her without feeling constrained by my anger. If your parents are consistently interrupting you or making incorrect assumptions about what you were going to say, it may be beneficial to set boundaries with them. These people suffer from a lack of Boundaries in their relationship. That's how it was for me, anyway. This list made me remember why I’m LC with my uBPD mom. My 5 year old found a work-around by starting up Angry Birds, clicking on the Angry Birds Cartoons, then browsing to his My mom suffered ptsd and loss of her parents and close ones, and she has a bit of problem to speak, not completely , even tho i care about her, and i believe she cares about me, i told her how she makes me depressed sometimes, sometimes i feel bad that i told her but again , i am a person too, who struggles with dark thoughts since i was 15 But the real thing that pushes me over the edge is that my parents try to ask me "what's wrong". My girlfriend was on full scholarship (tuition, room and board and fees). I’m not going to get into all my personal details but these words I read on reddit helped me with difficult elderly parent situation. And when they do trigger my emotions, they will use it against me to make me lose every single conversation. She also has major anger issues and I can clearly remember her fighting with my dad physically hurting each other, me - a 6 year old crying my eyes out in front of them screaming at the top of my lungs for them to stop. Maybe they will help you. I’ve asked her why she does this and explain why it makes me think she’s mad but she always says “it’s like if I don’t say something to you in the EXACT tone you need you think I’m mad at you. I used to feel guilt because Posted for a similar reason a good few months ago now. Both of my parents have anger issues, they just display it in different ways. I have now slowly started to accept that maybe there is no 'hope' for me or that I would never 'improve' or be better. We had a fight everytime I went out to look for a flat. They don't feel the dread that fills you, and makes you think I should just stay home so these things can't go wrong. Anyway, sorry for the novel. One of the things I would take from it is that you are not choosing to be angry, but neither is the other person making you angry. Ex, mad is being used to express mild irritation for those with aggressive parents, whereas mad describes actual anger for people without aggressive parents. Mind you, I’m 22, and my parents still think I act like a two year old. The trouble is, the more they keep on at you, the worse it will get. My parents sent me to school sick all the time when I was a kid because they had to go to work (so they said). And with that healing comes more anger. The ones who hate parenting act like me being childfree is ridiculous. Since our parents are the source of trauma, we often react negatively to any interaction, big or small. I can choose to not respond with anger, and I can choose to avoid scenarios that may anger me. Every once in a while my parents misconstrue what I say usually either because they don't actively listen to and critically examine what I say while I am speaking or they interrupt me and make false assumptions about what I was going to say and what I must have been thinking. It does not make it okay you had an incredibly personal part of your body altered before you could understand or object. They would avoid me, and made me sure I knew I "deserved it". I always second guess myself and try to avoid ways to not make the other person mad even if that means I am bringing myself down. My parents were disgusted with me crying. i wouldn’t say i’m an angry person, and none of my friends have ever seen me yell in the many years i’ve known them, but something about my mums presence brings out pure unbridled rage within me and i feel so guilty about it because i know she does so much to help This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). Or check it out in the app stores Parents who get mad when their kids are depressed. While you're doing that, make a plan about how you're going to do better next semester at keeping up with assignments; maybe find a homework tracking app for your phone, or start using a planner. I am TERRIFIED of my father. In many cases, though, My Parents make me angry sometimes, how do I deal with it? I was in the middle of watching some Christian video and trying to start my day with God when all of sudden my mother just My parents make me angry especially when they talk about politics. This probably goes for parents of kids too. This does not happen anywhere else. Miss me with this Oh man. It contributed to my self harm and mental health issues as I had no way to express anger, internalised it, then released through cutting. Or sometimes if you dont say anything it gets them more mad because then youre not listening and youve wasted their time and are being disrespectful 🙄 my brain subconsciously had to learn to listen for key words or tones to tune me back in just in time to make sure I say the right things at the right time, and dont say anything at the right times. You will not get closure on some stuff. Certain traits that come out in adulthood can be signs that your parents were toxic as a kid. You're now grounded or they took away your phone / console / whatever. I don't really Some parents have serious issues when they experience disrespect from their kids. My grandma gave me $1000 dollars, but they spent it to pay bills. They buy shit they don't need. The fact that I hurt them physically because I couldn't control them makes me feel sick. It's impossible to to insult me or make me angry. Once, he got mad at me for saying he beat me a lot when I was a kid (cause he says he doesn't remember) and told me that I've burnt my bridge to him. And I never have cash on me except for my cards and she expects me to have cash somehow ) 6. Seeing this on an almost daily basis at work wasn't what led me to be childfree, but it's given me a new perspective on parents. I told my parents about it just before bed, and they got really angry at me, and even shouted at me, and I tried to curl up under my quilt, but they got annoying at me. Feeling tired, dealing with daily responsibilities and demands, and attending to the needs of a child can all make it harder for There are multiple reasons adult children might resent or have anger toward their parents. m. ” i hate that my dad gets mad over my grades, yelling doesnt fix anything, it doesnt make me want to do better, i dont need his anger to understand that i need to fix my grades, i can do that myself. true. Then they get angry with me and think I am being disrespectful All animals can be infuriating sometimes and I'm sure every pet owner has been in your place. So let me get this straight cause I have a lot of questions BASED SOLELY ON WHAT’S GIVEN Your house/lawn is a mess and you’re saying your parents are unreasonably angry. And also, my parents are imperfect people They always get mad at me that I put my clothes somewhere they do not disturb anyone, but they're not on the clothing rack so they're "in the way". They seem absolutely disgusted by the When we get together all they want to do is talk about one of the following: A) dredging up some horrible family memory that I don't want to talk about, B) politics or getting really angry about some fox news talking point, C) making a racist or sexist joke (that they probably saw on youtube) or D) asking me repeatedly what is wrong with me I can certainly agree that the more pressing and controlling my mother was, the more oppositional and indifferent I was as a teen. n ik i can fix it n he should know that too, so i dont think theres a point in him getting mad. D. I need advice; My family is making me go mad. Growing up, my AF would constantly yell at me and beat me. They would never pass to me. It's a dysfunctional environment and I am so much more depressed and anxious than I was before. I once expressed that I liked a flavor of pop tart. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now Angry at my parents for "making" me . i hate that my dad gets mad over my grades, yelling doesnt fix anything, it doesnt make me want to do better, i dont need his anger to understand that i need to fix my grades, i can do that myself. I think it’s best to be honest with your parents. People like me and enjoy my company. I’m angry at society for normalizing the abuse we went through, and that when ever we try to bring it up so we can talk about these types of things, they say we’re just over sensitive. When I lived at home everything she did would annoy/piss me off and I always had an attitude with her. I know it was dumb for me to quit for that reason but now my parents take every chance they get to call me useless, dumb, and even doubt me. Or check it out in the app stores My parents never made me clean my room or do chores as a kid, and as a result, I grew up to become a slob. I also forgot to add that Im 22yo, meaning that Im no longer a small child that is dependent on her decisions. what make me so mad rn is that my bro is learning from my mom too so i hear x2 of their screaming every single Some men, as weldrwomn mentioned cannot process emotions. If you want to move out, get everything in order in terms of costs and all that, make sure you have enough. (If I make a mistake I calmly make a detour without making a fuss) When I do tell them to be quiet and let me drive, they retaliate and try to make themselves the victim and start turning it on me. His slaps are catastrophic. I completely understand your mindset, but it’s not helping you get anywhere, and neither will being mad at your parents. I've been telling them more often to help me learn and they always get mad at me when I do and when I tell them to take me somewhere. They pay over $100 for cable, and over $100 again for cell phones. since i dont view them as parental figures & they have poor parenting, it makes me overly angry It seems whether you are South Asian, East Asian, or even West Asian, the fathers are always so quick to become angry and abusive. My dad would get angry with me, tell me "what do you have to be upset about" and say I have no "real problems" like people starving in Africa or missing limbs. Yes, my parents do the same thing. Everything she says and does causes so much pent up frustration and anger in me. This is the first time in ten years that a parent has flat out accused me of deleting her kid’s work and making fake screenshots. It's been like 4 months since I last went home didn't feel welcome. And I just don’t understand why. I also do chores around the house so they don’t mind me playing video games, but they don’t like it either. Reply reply [deleted] • Or “no! Im not mad at you ___” and roll her eyes. “It’s normal for parents to make mistakes (they are human, after all),” says Aude Henin, Ph. If anything you’re just making your circumstances worse, because youre tarnishing your relationship with them. Later, I feel somewhat guilty for being so emotional. Then as you continue to heal it slowly (emphasis on slowly) starts to get better as you slowly learn to let the I love their kids! They make my job fun, and my regular kids are extremely smart and funny people and I love watching them learn and grow up. She'll sit on her phone in the bathroom for sometimes over half an hour while other people are waiting to use it. They have little 23 votes, 12 comments. I got so mad at my kitten once for stealing her sisters food (for the millionth time) that I scruffed her and skidded her across the floor back to Sometimes parents need to be shocked into being a better person/parent from another parent. Whenever I try to tell them how trapped I feel they just tell me to "go outside and walk". My name is Ethan. when i was afraid to do something she forced me to do that, which made me even more afraid and all that developed into an anxiety disorder. Or they'll say "you brought this on yourself. Even now if I get upset or angry my parent will get twice as upset or angry and take over the emotion of the situation and completely center themselves to the point I truly regret ever being upset/showing it and would do anything to have them stop being so upset. My Q is a retired medical professional, and to see her be so stupid now about things that used to be part of her profession is so incredibly frustrating. Same thing happened with Apple flavored Snapple. Or check it out in the app stores Anyones asian parents complain all the time and have anger issues? Rant/Vent The obsession over school prestige and rankings over financial choices from my Asian parents is driving me insane. It wasn't my choice to live. It stopped me in my place. One time he was extremely mad at me that he grabbed the remote and threw it at my head. Your subconscious remembers trauma and reacts accordingly. But there is a lot of anger at the enabling parent, like why did you stay in the marriage and not get divorced? Holy damn can I relate. The last few years of interaction with my parents it was me scrabbling around for small talk on topics that interested them. I’ve lived a pretty busy life, but not of the typical. ” It is strange that I go almost mad when I am visiting my parents. My parents never seemd to do anything to teach me things. Both of my kids have official ADHD diagnoses, school plans, medication, and therapists. Like they care. I feel you. You're parents gave you the opportunity to find such things a person you'll be happy with. It was His reaction to my anxiety makes me even more anxious as I then worry about getting noticeably anxious and getting him angry. My mother would just tell me I was "pathetic" and "a victim". Working and adult life is tough, you keep moving forwards though. Recently I was talking with my mom and she said a large reason she divorced with him was because he was always mad. The issue is, my parents dont even talk to me anymore unless its about going back to school. Some kids don't, and I can tell which parents are. This is really immature of me, but the feelings overwhelm me. These kids are growing up in families with moms and dads who love being parents. Whenever I interact with someone, they can tell i’m not okay and that makes me anxious because I am not good at hiding my depression. , the co-director of Massachusetts General Hospital’s Child Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Program. 7 which is overly acceptable in the work I do today She also has major anger issues and I can clearly remember her fighting with my dad physically hurting each other, me - a 6 year old crying my eyes out in front of them screaming at the top of my lungs for them to stop. Do any of you understand? Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now Angry at my parents for "making" me . Parents don’t understand the effect. Usually these would be "should" thoughts - about what they "should" be doing. Anger at how your inner child was hurt and forced to grow up too soon. Mostly spent with my mother, the lack of boundaries and invasion of privacy actually makes me deactivate, which makes her try to be closer even more. Personally, my reasons for anger was because they would often undermine or contradict my beliefs, and they would also treat me like a child. AF is now an angry, bitter, old man. Give them some time to cool down. I’m also anxious because i can feel my parents getting pissed off at me for my behavior, but my mental state has gotten SO bad that I Parents just try and do better than their own parents did add into the equation financial and social issues and you then start realizing despite how odd your family is. I've been down for a while now, and I've been spending a lot of time with my parents. It’s miserable to watch him suffer, but all he wants right now is to be held and cuddled, so we’re gonna cuddle. It makes me so sad for little me, especially since my brother had a diagnosis and medication. When that call comes my dad is in the background yelling and making everyone angry. All my casual chit chat, or serious discussions about important stuff like cooking (because lo and behold, I'm in my 20s and would love to learn how to take care of myself for once) or any sort of jokes very soon gets completely faded out by my mother's Allow me to be very clear, acknowledging that your parents probably just tried to do their best by you, does not justify their decision. Parents weren't willing to cede their power. He can only like buy me coffee or give me money for food, he can't talk to me about anything. Thanks for the reply, I guess her method of guilt tripping me and making me feel bad is working, but Im lucky to have my dad on my side to let me know of that. My parents aren't even all that bad, but my dad only knows how to express himself through anger. Then proceed to get angry at me. Anger towards me/my parents and depressed because I feel like a horrible mom that should just fucking leave. While I wait for therapy I will take everyone’s advice and suggests to heart, and start to make change. For the first couple of years I was like "Idk what to do, mom. I’m angry at society for contributing to their abuse. I haven't done anything but not talk to my dad. I have ADHD so you better believe I did this a few times in school. I’m from a small town in South Dakota, 20k people around to be exact. I was. But the minute she can’t understand it, she yells at me and gets angry about it. this seems pretty meaningless since i dont really have an advice for you :( but i The entire time I’ve lived with my parents, my mom and I never got along. He would rarely play me. From the early stages of pregnancy to when your teenagers are finally ready to leave the nest (even if they don't want to) we're here to help you through this crazy thing called parenting. They would usually just lock me up in my room and continue fighting while I hid under my blanket and tried to fall asleep. So, my parents are almost constantly angry, and when they aren't angry, they're still pissed off in some way. It's important to be respectful of your parents, but at the same time it's also important to be firm in asserting yourself and making sure that your thoughts are heard. I'm really sorry. Up until I was about 13, my parents had made all of the decisions for me. i look at my mom who has a nice pointed nose, and I could have had that. They blamed me with abandoning my family. Usually once I send them evidence that their child is lying they believe me, though. My anger cracked and I saw the look on her face. It was full of shame. /r/Parenting is the place to discuss the ins and out as well as ups and downs of child-rearing. My anger always gets the best of me and I hate it. But I'm finally happy. I just dont know how to deal with them, i love them but wish they could be normal parents or at least a bit more normal. im not even angry or sad abt the grade n i dont rlly care abt it The anger faded over the years, I am not angry at them anymore. How little they actually taught me, and prepared me for this moment. like the other person said, something physical could help too. instead my dad couldnt go one second without abusing My parents never seemd to do anything to teach me things. i told her but of course she won’t listen and just claims i have “an attitude” when im clearly just frustrated. I did one semester of college, and dropped out, because checking my grades was causing me so much anxiety and stress, I had an emotional breakdown during a lecture, and embarrassed myself in front of 60-70 other peers because my grade was 2% under the passing grade. They refused to support me financially. hey it happens to me all the time and the situation really is very similar to yours. It’s not the specific behavior that sets off the parent, it’s the disrespect that the child displays. Honestly, these sounds make me irrationally angry. Now I suffer all the hardships of living and being alive. My little brother was the only one I can still bond with. Holy fucking hell, please shut up! I don't give a rat's ass on how you think all black people are from the fucking ghetto and that Asians are the good immigrants. Not too long ago, he was driving me to see the doctor and there was traffic on the way. I couldn't go to the dentist myself because I was a child and had no money or job, so that My parents have these huge fights and arguments at home, they’re loud and proud and don’t care who hears them. Back in the day parents said "Don't bother me" to their kids!! Back when I was a kid, my folks, all the parents told us IF THESE PEOPLE CALL ME or IF I HAVE TO COME UP TO THAT SCHOOL we knew there would be hell to pay. All of it is based off of a very immature emotional system that can’t handle anger. Okay hour goes by he's throwing his things out of the bed and kicking the wall as hard as he can and any time I correct him he laughs at me and it triggers such an anger in me. I don’t want to be angry at her. We even got mad at each other if one of us set her off , if my brother got a bad grade or my sister broke a glass or I my dog had a accident, for the rest of the day she was angry with us . The "Don't bother me - s/he's your problem from 8:00 to 3:00" never used to happen. "I am angry at my parents for abusing me. thank you so much for your concern. I have found that if I walk people through how to deal with me when I am irrational, things go better. I have always been the good child, maybe even the "golden child" in my parents eyes growing up. she also does wierd things like when she came last time she brought socks with her as she says that I'm a messy person and my floor is dirty so she Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now "what you are saying is not true" and so on. I play video games every day but I get all As in school and do whatever my parents ask me to do. I'm a pleasant, easy, going, polite, friendly person. . As if I'm dumb and can't tell the difference. Then my mom acted like she was doing me a huge favor by buying me a $12 pair of pants at Walmart. i’ve noticed that i have serious anger problems when it comes to my mum- literally no one else, just my mum. but right now it makes me angry AF. Like fuck, stop trivializing what I feel! It's annoying as fuck! Or “no! Im not mad at you ___” and roll her eyes. so it made complete sense to me that this may be the case My parents do the same and it’s like that meme “Tell me you’re ____ without saying that you’re _____” So basically tell me you don’t respect me without saying it to my face. so im 3 days sober and was aiming for a month, but my parents always say something or do something selfish and it makes me angry. Would make me run laps around the court every slight mistake and basically didn't even bother to make me a better basketball player. Sometimes I grieve parts of my childhood or feel angry towards my parent(s) when remembering a specific thing they did to me, but I'm not angry at my parents anymore as a whole / generally. She would even call me when I was with friends just to tell me I'm either too skinny or too chubby (my mom is largely overweight) ,my tattoos, that I'm particularly spotty that day, that my hair is awful, that she doesn't like my makeup or decisions I make. I’m not angry at my parents for not medicating me, as I was in favour of not taking medication at those times. I had severely damaged teeth for over 5 years that desperately required medical attention, but my parents refused to take me to the dentist because "it cost too much". They're angry at me for not knowing how to do things which I was never taught. 404 votes, 114 comments. Tears were viewed as manipulation (even if she had hit us), anger was disrespect etc. I understand my parents are nervous drivers whenever I drive, but holy shitCalm the fuck out. Negative would be an understatement. And that’s ok. NMom bought like 20 boxes of this shit and I didn't eat them because it wasn't that serious and I never asked for 523 purple pop tarts. Anger is still there, but I'm not as much of a stranger to it as I was then. Which sparked a good majority of the arguments. It's always the exhausted, depressed parents who criticize us for not wanting kids. Then talk to your parents, tell them that you don’t want to argue with them or to find reasons to be angry, but that you have to be your own man and take care of yourself. Even in front of people. My anger was right, I was so fed up with dealing with their illusion of being caring parents and me playing along, while deep inside I knew how My dad is a total ass, my mom is an alcoholic, and while they're both okay most of the time and love and support me, they can just be so so hurtful. My (17) whole life, my mom has made me feel like having emotions is a problem for her. I've noticed that the young parents who love spending time with their children usually don't have a problem with childfree people. I ate one once. ” I didn’t look back, did very well in college, and now have a good job in a major city a few hours away from home. I had anger management issues, and went to therapy to figure out better ways to manage my emotions and responses. when I was young, my dad got angry at me for not being able to do my math homework, and broke my nose. Some One realization that came to me while diving into specific experiences was to look at the world in which my parents grew up. (For the record, I'm 28 and working full time and I'm covering all the bills at home and paying for practically everything. Since I became an adult I’ve come to learn that almost every single adult in my life growing up knew I was being abused and to my knowledge did nothing to help me or make me feel better. But if I ever dared to cry in front of my parents, they never consoled me or asked me what's wrong. I agonized over this decision for months and she knows that. It was the first time I really saw her and I was beyond horrified. Almost every day, for the entirety of my career, parents have inflicted anger at their children in exceedingly unhealthy ways. Accusations. Moved back home temporarily to job hunt/prepare myself using online resources rather than go into debt with grad school. If anything, even though I’m straight, having gay parents made me more comfortable with people in the LGBTQ+ scene. They still love me and all but what I did was never okay and it never will be. She makes me call for doctor appointments, for government aids, makes me read he letters and try to figure everything out for her. It's up to us to ensure we don't inflict the same scars on our offspring as our parents inflicted on us. I don't understand what makes them so angry about cleaning. I'm confident in myself and just feel great. If you tell the parents your grade, just say "mom, I failed a test". You’re 100% allowed to be annoyed. This can make it hard to identify the problem. Why I value connection on my own time, planned with others or alone. Edit: I should note that my parents don’t really believe into this mental health stuff, only advice I was given from them was “ignore it” or “I know” so I’m not Reddit iOS Reddit Android Reddit Premium About Reddit Advertise Blog Careers Press. My daughter was crying and screaming no, absolutely terrified of me. They made/ created me. I wanted to do so many after school programs for choir, but my parents told me I had to work instead cuz “working while your younger is more important and makes you look better to companies” Well, it wasn’t worth it. So if you make me feel sad, you get anger. View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. I never felt what my anger had turned me into until that moment. Especially the ones that I got slapped or yelled at in front of people and felt humiliated. My anger was right, I was so fed up with dealing with their illusion of being caring parents and me playing along, while deep inside I knew how And everytime i get very very tired and break down crying or just tearing up my parents get mad at me. I am just as angry at society for letting them. why should i be punished for letting out my anger? it’s like i’m not allowed to have feelings anymore. This goes so deep that the witnessing of any emotion causes an overwhelming response of the only emotion men are allowed, and that is expressed as anger. When I tell my mom she just sides with him and tells me "Everyone's entitled to react how they want and I'm responsible for whether or not I She'll get mad at me for using the bathroom when she needs to go and she makes a big deal about it, but when the situation is reversed, she doesn't care. My dad is a total ass, my mom is an alcoholic, and while they're both okay most of the time and love and support me, they can just be so so hurtful. I'm so fucking tired of these clowns voting for Trump two times despite having a queer daughter. Well when I started getting a little heavier instead of helping me find exercises I enjoyed and researching better meals to make she simply called me “chubby cheeks” or “miss piggy” and shamed me any time I tried to get a second helping during dinner. Here we can support each other, share stories, fears, vent and ask questions. Yelling. Particularly, getting angry at me for being depressed, needing help, needing space, and so on I once said "I think I am not supposed to owe to my parents for them making a choice to bring me into this world. bc my mom would always make me feel bad for crying in front of her, now i never do and when i feel like the tears will just come out of my eyes i just get out of whatever place im in with her and cry alone. I've made the best friends I've ever had and people I can count on. My dad’s is more overt, screaming/hitting and my moms is more shaming/name-calling. I also managed to find a girl that makes me happy every second I spend with her. Loads of really random ones, he made comments about my sanitary products after learning about cycles in school, he tell me "facts" on things I knew about that was way off and wouldn't believe me if I said, explained or showed him differently but would if his Dad jumped in and agreed with me without argument I’m 18 and my parents don’t let me lock my door, they always say “why do u need to lock u door” and as soon as I try to explain they yell about how they are my parent and I can’t not listen to them. They always get mad at me that I put my clothes somewhere they do not disturb anyone, but they're not on the clothing rack so they're "in the way". My parents are both toxic, my father was always more overtly abusive which made it easy for me to come to terms with and accept. During that month, I tried baking for him, pouring coffee and tea Oh boy. Or check it out in the app stores My mother makes me angry . what he did was f up but in other ways (besides apologizing🙄) he’s shown his love for me and we’re super close. The route the took was picking me up and carrying me or forcing me to do whatever it was I was crying over, which meant I got where they needed me to go or do what was needed When I was a teenager, my parents thought it would be a good idea to wash the bedsheets every sunday at 9. 00 a. I’m 26 and I find both of my parents get mad at me for very bad reasons. but don't be so critical it'll only make you feel more lonely. Once I turned 14, my parents made me get my working papers. You just need to accept that not everything involving your elderly parents will have a satisfying conclusion. My parents are mad at me and they are now acting like I don’t exist, my mother refuses to look at me or talk to me. Something about the way she tries to help seems to trigger me and I can’t quite figure out what it is. my moms emotionally abusive(i don’t really talk to her), but my dad is super loving. the next day I know people who do not have reasonable parents for whom this what not enough. All this because you made up an excuse. They would always get irritated at every mistake I made and I knew they thought I was dragging the team down. Some how not saying the words "here's money for you mom" somehow makes me the worst human being there is. This is why with friends, I feel secure, and generally act secure in life outside of home. It sucks that my parents fight all the time, don’t make it worse by His reaction to my anxiety makes me even more anxious as I then worry about getting noticeably anxious and getting him angry. You don't know the reason, your parents assume the usual: videogames. Being overwhelmed but blaming the children for it. im old enough to know what im doing. I love my parents dearly, and have a good relationship with them, but they can be so condescending in the way they talk to me. However, even though I love my parents the other part of me has grown increasingly resentful and angry with them. Being a post-grad young adult, I've been getting the job talk non-stop. Thank god though my sister sees what I’m going through, but they are too scared to tell him. Instead, you are choosing the thoughts about the other person that are then making you angry. Instead I had it done to me. my mom just stomped upstairs, & started yelling. They think I won't ever succeed in life. There are three different types of emotionally neglectful Blaming parents for their struggles keeps these people stuck in angry, anxious, and depressed feelings, and interferes with their ability to think about what they could do to make It makes me upset the way he treats women. I asked how to deal with the anger towards my dad in particular as it was keeping me up at night and keeping me highly stressed. It was My parents made a huge stink over it, threatened to kick me out, and the pastor came over to tell me, “God wanted me at _ church. Me being introverted and her being extremely extroverted. Up until around the age of 14 my mother was in and out of the hospital with health complications before finally receiving a pacemaker. In our freshman year, she had a major depressive episode after being sexually lol, I’m Reddit on 2 hours of sleep because both my son and I have COVID now. However, being around my mom just turns me into a horrible bully. I wake up WANTING to go to work even if it's only 4 am. Turns out forgiving myself just made me commit far more sinister things as I wasn't 'held down' by the guilt. One thing that I found most useful is that other people aren't making me angry, I'm making me angry by choosing it as a response. This is not an ask reddit or advice reddit. the exact same thing happened to me. Absolutely. Set boundaries. I’ll paraphrase. No it totally makes sense. We’d be in more contact if she would actually call me, but honestly I Your parents are doing you a huge favor letting you live there and not making you live on your own, where you would be a lot more miserable and have to work even harder to support everything. Makes me feel the therapist has better things to do than listen to me, makes me feel like it's all in my head and I'm making things upvicious. This was my only day off in the week since they forced me to work after school and on saturdays, but they made me get up really early anyway. aizabnpphwantsxddstdyainkyndoahlabhpzngzjwircrnbc